Pigs Having It Rough

As if the swine flu thing was not enough the papers over here have been filled with stories of “snouts in the trough” as the full extent of the double standards of Members of Parliament's allowances/expenses system have been revealed over the last couple of weeks.

Not only are these people paid what any normal person would consider a pretty fine salary this gets topped up by tax free expense payments that add up (on average) to £144,000 per year.

The key word here is tax free – unlike every other tax payer in the country who would be liable to pay tax these scumbags pay no tax on their “allowances” and get very creative with the definition of their main home.

Under the “rules” they are entitled to relief if they have to pay for a second home to live in while attending parliament (and it is not just mortgage, council tax and utilities – they can claim £400 per month for food for fecks sake) and they bend the rules to line their trouser pockets.

Let's take Hazel Blears as an example, she was claiming a second home allowance for a flat in London and then shortly before selling it nominated it as her main residence. This meant that she was not liable to the 40% capital gains tax on the £45,000 that she made when selling it - “I acted within the rules” was her initial response but she has since written a cheque for £13,332 to the Inland Revenue.

Now 40% of 45,000 works out at £18,000 so what is going on here?

Her initial response has been typical of all those outed by the Daily Telegraph for things as diverse as having the moat cleaned, repairing water pipes under the tennis court, replacing toilet seats, bath plugs, televisions, helipad maintenance, swimming pool maintenance and repairs, £115 plus VAT for the replacement of 25 light bulbs (WTF?) the list is endless.

The only good thing to come out of this affair is the genuine level of anger being felt across the country at the shenanigans of MPs from all parties

There is only one answer to this and that is for all MPs to live in a single apartment block in central London supplied and maintained by the civil service. Any additional expense claims to be transparent (put them online) and audited by an independent group of auditors and any transgressions to be prosecuted under the laws which apply to everyone else living and working here.

For some classic mealy mouthed “explaining” watch this clip from last week's Question Time.

Meanwhile pigs get a bad press when the reality is that they are highly intelligent animals who by coincidence happen to taste fantastic when the various cuts they provide are prepared and cooked – I am now off for a bacon sandwich and a vat of coffee to take away the taste of corruption from my mouth.